In April 1899, the following ad appeared in The Chatham Record:
HEAD ACHE
“Both my wife and myself have been using CASCARETS and they are the best medicine we have ever had in the house. Last week my wife was frantic with headache for two days. She tried some of your CASCARETS and they relieved the pain in her head almost immediately. We both recommend Cascarets.”
Sounds like good stuff, no? The following week, another ad for Cascarets appeared, but this time is was for a different ailment:
INSOMNIA
“I have been using CASCARETS for Insomnia, with which I have been afflicted for over twenty years, and I can say that Cascarets have given me more relief than any other remedy I have ever tried.”
Wow! This stuff cure headaches and insomnia! But wait – there’s more. The following week, yet another ad for Carscarets turned up. Guess what else it’s good for?
BAD BREATH
“. . . My daughter and I were bothered with sick stomach and our breath was very bad. After taking a few drops of Cascarets we have improved wonderfully. They are a great help in the family.”
OK, so my headache is gone, my insomnia is cured, and my breath smells like sweet violets. But what about my unfortunate complexion?
PIMPLES
“My wife had pimples on her face, but she has been taking CASCARETS and they have all disappeared.”
Wonderful stuff! I would get up and order some Cascarets right now if only I weren’t feeling so sluggish.
What’s that? Cascarets can do something for that, too?
LAZY LIVER
“I have been troubled a great deal with a turpid liver, which produces constipation. I found CASCARETS to be all you claim for them and I secured such relief the first trial, that I purchased another supply and was completely cured.”
And if you think this week’s ad is a bit too personal, hang on to your hat. A week later, the following ad offered yet another use for those amazing little tablets:
TAPE WORMS
“A tape worm eighteen feet long at least came upon the scene after my taking two CASCARETS. This I am sure has caused my bad health for the past three years.”
Yep. That would do it.
A true panacea. It’s a shame Cascarets isn’t sold anymore — my head hurts, I’m up all night, I’ve got this curious garlicky odor, my face is a mess, I have no energy, and I can’t seem to gain any weight. Darn. That miracle elixir would have really come in handy.
Awesome blog!