Query Department

Predating Laugh-In by 43 years, this series of question-and-answer quickies appeared in the 7 May 1925 edition of the Chatham Record. The addition of local town names adds a nice touch to an otherwise groan-worthy collection:

QUERY DEPARTMENT. Answers by John

Can paper be used effectively to keep one warm? -Josie, Moncure.

Answer– Yes, Josie. We once gave a 30-day note at a bank and we were in a sweat for a month.

Do fairy tales always begin with the phrase: “Once Upon a Time?” – George, Colon.

Answer– No, George. Sometimes they say: “Sorry dear, but I was detained at the office.”

Is it true that men marry women sometimes just because she may have money? -Gertrude, Apex.

Answer– Not always, Gertrude. Sometimes it is because the man has no money.

Can you tell me where I may visit an apiary; I want to see one? – Willie, Pittsboro.

Answer– Yes, Willie. Come by some afternoon and we will go with you. We like to see the monkeys too.

My sweetheart will not inherit any property until the death of his uncle Jeremiah, who is now 75 years old. What would you advise about our marriage? – Jennie, Bonlee.

Answer– ‘Sall right Jennie, if he has enough to live on for two or three years.

Why is it that woman are not as fond of radio as are the men? – John, Siler City.

Answer– Don’t know John, unless it is because they have to stay quiet and listen to it.

I want to make lots of money and I have been advised to go into the newspaper business. What would you suggest? – Bill, Ore Hill.

Answer– Be sensible, Bill.

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